You Are Loved
by CarenM
Summary: This is Esme's back story Well, my version anyways! . I've always liked Esme, so this came to me naturally. Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I'm just a fan xP
1. Benji

_"Hey Esme! I bet you can't climb that tree over there!" cried the little 8 year old. Esme's eyes hardened playfully._

_"I bet I can, Richard!" She shouted to her cousin. Esme looked at the immense oak tree. She walked towards it. She positioned her hands on the branch stubs, and began to climb up the branches._

'_Boy, this is a hard one. Mama's going to be mad when she sees her sixteen year old coming home in a messy dress.' Esme thought while tackling a hard branch. She made it a good 10 feet on the air. She sat with her knees dangling, and then slid backwards to hang upside down. _

_"I told you I could!" she taunted. She tried to bring herself back up, when she flipped backwards and landed in a pile in the ground. A horrific pain flashed from her leg. She sat up and looked at her left leg. It was on a lopsided angle and covered in blood. Esme began to cry loudly. Richard stood in shock._

_"Go get my parents, you idiot!" Esme shouted Richard. Richard ran towards the house. In less than five minutes, Mr. Platt was out in the meadow with Richard. Mr. Platt scooped up his injured daughter and carried her to the family Model T. He called for his wife and son. The family rushed outside. Mrs. Platt gasped._

_"Esme, honey, what happened?" Her mother questioned._

_"I fell." Esme winced out. Her father started up the automobile. The family rushed of to the local hospital. Esme's father carried her into the hospital, where a young doctor met them._

_"Sir, what happened to her?" the doctor asked. _

_"She fell out of a tree. I think her leg is broken."_

_"Come, follow me." He said. Her father followed him to a large ward. _

_"I'll take it from here. You can wait in the foyer. Thank you for taking her so swiftly." He said. Mr. Platt transferred Esme to the doctor's arms. Esme winced. The doctor took her to an empty bed._

_"You really did some serious damage to your leg here."_

_"Of course I did." She said. She looked at his strange amber eyes. He was good looking, for a doctor who was working in a hospital in Ohio. _

_"I'm Esme, by the way, Esme Platt," she said. _

_" I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen." He said._

I lied awake, thinking about the day that I've never forgotten for 10 years. The way that Dr. Cullen treated me, like I was his own or something. And those eyes, I've never seen amber eyes. I sighed and looked at my expanding body. The baby would be here any day now. I wanted to see this little child more than anything. I wanted him to grow up and become a caring man, something like Dr. Cullen, but nothing like his father. Charles Evenson was one of the worst men I've ever met. I only married him because my mother approved of him, not because he loved me or treated me fairly. I was quite relieved to find that he'd been drafted into the Great War. But then he came back…alive. So once I found out I was pregnant, I left to come live with my brother, Stefen and his wife, Claire. They seemed to be the only ones who cared.

Sudden pressure on my stomach kicked me out of my train of thought.

_He's here!_ I thought. _My baby is here!_

"Stefen! Claire! He's coming!" I shouted from my bedroom. Claire came bursting in from the hallway, with Stefen hot on her heels.

"Stefen, wake up Sarah, get the automobile ready!" Claire shouted with clear annoyance. Claire guided me down the stairs and out to the waiting automobile. We drove off to the nearest hospital. When we arrived, a nurse led me into a small operating room. She assisted me onto the bed. Claire forced herself into the room.

"Esme, dear, I'll stay with you until he's out, okay?" she said in a soothing tone.

" Thank you, Claire," I said, my voice breaking. Just after I said that, the pain hit me. I started to scream and yell. Claire kept trying to calm me down a little bit. Claire then harassed a nurse to get a doctor. The nurse ran out in fear. She came back with a middle-aged man.

"Ms. Platt, I'm Dr. O'Leary. Don't you worry, we'll get him out in no time. The first thing we need is to clear the room of unwanted people." He said. Claire shot him a nasty glare.

"Lady, please leave this room and let her husband in.," he snarled.

"She doesn't have a husband. He died. I'm the only one she has!" Claire retorted. The doctor nodded and let Claire stay.

" Miss, I need you to relax and let us try to do our best to…"

"How can I relax? Get him out now!" I shouted in his face. Another pang of pain washed over me. I screamed as loud as I could. A new hoard of doctors rushed into the room. They muttered words around me. Then one young doctor told me it was time and told me to start pushing. I obeyed him. I used all my might for the first one. They told me to do it again. Claire squeezed my hand. I heaved hard and pushed again. I was now covered in sweat. I repeated the motion again and again, until the pressure in my hips stopped, and a strained little cry filled the room.

"Ms. Platt, you are now the mother of a beautiful baby boy." A young mid-wife said gracefully. My eyes began to tear. _A baby boy!_ I thought. They wrapped him up in a soft cotton blanket and handed him to me. I looked at the little child, and 3 words poured from my mouth.

"Benjamin William Platt." I choked out. Claire smiled. Everyone was swarming me, asking me questions I was too tried to answer. I was about to tell them to go away, when someone interrupted me.

"Everyone, please leave her be, let her rest!" the man shouted over the commotion in the room. The cloud of people left, and Carlisle Cullen was left standing in the room. I was in awe. He winked at me.

"I'll leave you to bond with your son." He said, and walked out the door.


	2. A Sad Loss

I lied on my side, looking at my son in the cradle next to my bed. I stared at his little features. He was the most beautiful little boy in the world. I sighed. I don't think I've ever loved a human being more than I loved my little Benji.

"I love you, my little boy," I whispered to him. I smiled and closed my eyes and fell into a calmed slumber.

I awoke the next morning, to see the cradle gone and Dr. Cullen sitting beside my bed. I panicked and sat up in my bed.

"Where's my son?" I said. Dr. Cullen took my hand.

"Ms. Platt, I'm sorry to have to tell you that your son succumbed to a respiratory illness last night. I'm truly saddened by your loss."

"What? No… he was perfectly fine, just last night… He was only 4 days…" I stammered, ripping my hand from the doctor's solid grip.

"I'm sorry that this happened. We did all we could to save him, but it was just too much for his little body to take."

"No, this can't happen to me now!" I shouted, my voice woven with anguish. Tears tugged at my eyelids. One stray tear fell from my eye to my hand.

"Shh… Don't cry, dear. I'll sign your release and you can go home. I'll send for my assistant to help you get ready." Dr. Cullen said. I nodded and he got up and left the room. I let out a small whimper and let the whimper turn into full-fledged crying.

"Esme, honey, you have to say something. I know this is hard, but you haven't spoken a word in days. I'm worried about you." Stefen said. I knew what he meant, that it wasn't a good thing for me to act like this, but I had a damn good reason to be like this. I lost my son. He was going to be the best thing to ever happen to me, and now he's the reason for my pure anguish. I looked up at my brother, and gave him a blank look.

"Stefen, can I go for a walk?" I said. He smiled.

"Sure, I'll go with you."

"No, I'll be fine by myself, I'll see you later." I said. I stood up and kissed my brother on the cheek and went to get my coat and my jacket. I walked out the door and followed the lane. The wind picked up, and the fresh scent of autumn filled my nose. I inhaled deeply and began to think about the last few years. When I first met that wretched man I called a husband. I wondered what he was doing at that moment. Was he still in 'love' with me, or had he moved on and is currently courting another innocent woman. I sighed. I came to a meadow. A sudden urge filled me and I kicked off my shoes and ran into the field of tall grass and flowers. I spun around a couple of times and fell on my back. The setting sun danced on the white flowers and played on my curls. I laid out for a while, and then sat up. I looked at my left leg and thought of the day that I first met Dr. Cullen. And the way he looked at me when he was telling me my son died. It was like he wasn't one of those doctors who rehearsed the bad news, and that he was actually truly sorry that I lost my newborn. I got up from the field and walked towards the rocky area nearby. I took off my jacket and slowly walked into the forest. I ran my hands up and down the trunks on the ancient birches and pines. I kept going until I saw the giant cliffs that litter the landscape. I walked right to the edge of the cliff and looked down to the dry, rocky bottom of the gorge. I began to think of the beautiful boy of mine that was too young to die, and his shameful wreck of a father. I teetered on my toes for a couple of brief moments.

"Lady, step away from the edge of the cliff. Come over here. Don't jump." I looked back. A man in a flannel shirt looked at me with concern. I returned my glance to the bottom of the gorge. I let my body relax and felt the cool wind whisk past my face.

I heard the shouting from the man that tried to help me. The ground rushed towards me. I closed my eyes. The sickening thud of a body hitting rocks rang in my ears. The pain eventually caught up with me. My vision began to spot and sleepiness washed over me.

_I'm with you now, Benji._


	3. A Change

A sudden pain jolted me awake. I screamed one of the worst screams I'd ever screamed.

"It's okay." A familiar voice said. I searched my mind for the man behind the voice. I remembered. Dr. Carlisle Cullen. _You bastard!_ I thought in anger. _How can he tell me that it's okay that I'm in pain?_ I screamed louder as the burn continued. His cool hand stroked my face.

"It's going to be over soon. Don't worry." He said, moving some hair out of my face.

"Kill me! Kill me now!" I screamed at him. He looked away, clearly hurt with my words.

"Esme, please don't say that…"

"Carlisle, How long is this going to be? She clearly can't take this pain…" an unfamiliar voice cut in.

"Not now, Edward… She needs a little bit more time; she'll be changed in a matter of hours." Carlisle finished. I writhed and continued with my horror cries. _Changed? What did he mean changed?_ I thought. The fiery pain flew throughout my body. My breathing sped up to a loud heaving gasp any my heart pounded hard. Carlisle took my hand. I gripped his stony hand in pain.

"I want to die, let me die!" I sobbed. I had nothing left to live for. My son died, my husband beat me, and I jumped off a cliff. I didn't deserve to live. I caught a glimpse of his face. He looked like he wanted to cry, but couldn't. A new flash of burning pain scorched my body. I screamed. I gripped his hand harder. My breathing sped up even faster. The burn was now completely unbearable. I released a new shriek that would've woken the dead. My body seized up, the pain limiting my movement. Something in my body changed. My fingers began to cool by a few degrees. As my fingers cooled, the burn persisted in my chest, like a searing brand in my lungs. Every breath I took was like swallowing flaming acid. I cringed a little bit. I wanted this death to kill me soon. My arms began to cool along with my fingers, but the firestorm that engulfed my chest continued to burn. I felt myself sliding into a haze, and my heartbeat slowing. My hand gripped harder as my mind slid into unconsciousness.

I snapped myself from my unconsciousness. I looked around the room I was in, analyzing my surroundings. I was not at my house. I got off the bed and scrambled to my feet. The house was very quiet, almost too quiet. I inhaled, and throat burned, like I ran across the Grand Canyon without the slightest amount of water.

"Hello? Is anyone here?" I called out. A hand placed itself on my shoulder. I turned around to see a young, bronze-haired boy, barely 18 years old. I looked at him with widened eyes.

"Hello. I'm Edward. Come with me. I'll take you to Carlisle." He said in a velvety voice. He took my hand and led me to a large, wood-paneled office. The doctor sat at a large desk, scribbling in a notebook. He greeted me with a warm smile.

"Hello. I see you've woken up. Please, sit down." He said, gesturing to a chair. I gingerly sat down, folding my hands in my lap.

"Esme, I need to tell you what Edward and I are. We are what the humans would refer to as undead. We, oh, how am I going to put this…" He began, massaging his forehead.

"We are… Vampires. I am not as young as you think I am. I was born in England in the early 1640's. I became a part of this vampire world when I was 23 years old. I haven't aged a day since. Do you believe me or not?" He asked. I sat there is disbelief.

"How can you be…? You seem so normal…" I began. I paused for a brief moment.

"Am I one your kind?" I asked, tucking a curl behind my ear. I was too confused.

"Well, yes. I had to change you. You were still alive when I found you in the morgue. You had this, or death." He said, his voice sharpening on the word death. I lowered my head.

"You should've let me die." I murmured. I stood up and stormed out of the room. I retraced my steps to the room I awoke in earlier. I slammed the door behind me. I sat on the bed and curled up in a ball. My body heaved and racked with every sharp upset breath, but no tears fell. I laid my head on the pillow, and stared at the wall. I glittering sparkle caught my eye. I looked down at my forearm. It looked as if I had diamonds as skin. My face contorted in sadness.

_I'm a freak!_


End file.
